relationship Archives - Ben Michaelis, PhD

“Signs You’re Not Ready to Get Married” – The List

Getting married is a big deal. People spend years planning for their big day, spending huge swaths of money and inviting everyone they know to join in the festivities. And once the wedding’s over and the thank you notes are sent, you start your new life with your main partner-in-crime by your side. From then […]

“Are you Dating a Narcissist? 9 Warning Signs to Watch Out For” – Today Show

So, you think you’ve found the one? He’s witty, charismatic, attractive, and he showers you with compliments. There is a flash of excitement and everything seems perfect — except sometimes he exaggerates when he talks about his resume. And, you wish he wasn’t so condescending to your BFF. The bragging? Well, it is a turn-off. […]

“7 Signs Your Friend Group Is Toxic” – Health

In the penultimate episode of HBO’s Girls, the four main characters squeeze into a bathroom for a group meeting that’s meant to be healing, but instead serves the final nail in the coffin of their friendship. “I have come to realize how exhausting and narcissistic and ultimately boring this whole dynamic is,” says Shoshanna (Zosia Mamet), defending her decision not to […]

“Why every relationship could benefit from couple’s therapy” – The List

When we picture couple’s therapy, we often think of a married couple’s relationship in which one person has discovered the other is cheating, or in which one person is just no longer feeling the spark anymore. Generally, couple’s therapy has been shown to lead to significant improvements in relationship matters, but these studies are traditionally […]

“Stop Feeling Bad About Ghosting” – Tonic

It’s better for you than you think.   For many reasons, the first few weeks of January are the busiest time of year for dating apps. And as singles turn back to their phones with the hope that this is the year they find love, it’s helpful to remember the cardinal rule of not wasting your time: Ghosting is now an acceptable way to end […]

“Three’s company: Singles and their coupled pals share apartments” – Chicago Tribune

“All couples disagree,” said Dr. Ben Michaelis, a New York clinical psychologist who’s seen all manner of unique living configurations. “But some couples handle disagreements in stride with good coping mechanisms, while others end up with intense screaming matches involving broken dishes.” Roommates don’t want to feel like they should choose a side, he added. […]

“Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall? The Fascination of Odd Couples” – New York Times

But it’s slightly bizarre when your otherwise hip and socially liberal friends make the same kind of comments, particularly when the couples in question are not on the child-producing or child-rearing path. What’s going on here? How is this any different from racism or homophobia? “It’s absolutely not different in almost all ways but one: […]

"The 20 Best Things You Can Do For Your Relationship" – Redbook

Spend time each week, maybe it’s every Friday night, talking about your hopes and aspirations as a couple, and think about what will make you happiest going forward. You can say, ‘We’ll buy a house in our favorite neighborhood within five years.’ or, ‘We’ll hvae another kid by next summer,’ or even, ‘We’ll eventually visit […]