Love Archives - Ben Michaelis, PhD

“How to Know If You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship” – the List

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports on their domestic violence fact sheets that almost 20 people are physically abused by a partner every single minute. Nationally, domestic violence hotlines across the country get about 20,800 calls every day. The numbers are staggering, and it’s very disturbing to think about all the people who live […]

“Signs You’re Not Ready to Get Married” – The List

Getting married is a big deal. People spend years planning for their big day, spending huge swaths of money and inviting everyone they know to join in the festivities. And once the wedding’s over and the thank you notes are sent, you start your new life with your main partner-in-crime by your side. From then […]

“Are you Dating a Narcissist? 9 Warning Signs to Watch Out For” – Today Show

So, you think you’ve found the one? He’s witty, charismatic, attractive, and he showers you with compliments. There is a flash of excitement and everything seems perfect — except sometimes he exaggerates when he talks about his resume. And, you wish he wasn’t so condescending to your BFF. The bragging? Well, it is a turn-off. […]

“Why every relationship could benefit from couple’s therapy” – The List

When we picture couple’s therapy, we often think of a married couple’s relationship in which one person has discovered the other is cheating, or in which one person is just no longer feeling the spark anymore. Generally, couple’s therapy has been shown to lead to significant improvements in relationship matters, but these studies are traditionally […]

“Stop Feeling Bad About Ghosting” – Tonic

It’s better for you than you think.   For many reasons, the first few weeks of January are the busiest time of year for dating apps. And as singles turn back to their phones with the hope that this is the year they find love, it’s helpful to remember the cardinal rule of not wasting your time: Ghosting is now an acceptable way to end […]

“Three’s company: Singles and their coupled pals share apartments” – Chicago Tribune

“All couples disagree,” said Dr. Ben Michaelis, a New York clinical psychologist who’s seen all manner of unique living configurations. “But some couples handle disagreements in stride with good coping mechanisms, while others end up with intense screaming matches involving broken dishes.” Roommates don’t want to feel like they should choose a side, he added. […]

“Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall? The Fascination of Odd Couples” – New York Times

But it’s slightly bizarre when your otherwise hip and socially liberal friends make the same kind of comments, particularly when the couples in question are not on the child-producing or child-rearing path. What’s going on here? How is this any different from racism or homophobia? “It’s absolutely not different in almost all ways but one: […]